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What’s Going On?!

Dear, oh dear!

A good blog (well at least the ones that I enjoy visiting) posts interesting things on a regular basis.  To that end, mine is not a good blog!  I knew it had been a while since I had written anything but didn’t realise quite how long.

I admit I’ve been a bit quiet recently.  Suddenly the blog and Facebook and yes, even my beloved Twitter have all felt too much of an effort.  It isn’t that I haven’t had things to say, it’s just that I haven’t felt that sudden need to get out my phone or laptop to share it with the world.  I think that may have been the case in real life too as I’m suddenly aware I haven’t been returning personal texts, calls and emails with any real enthusiasm.  I’m not depressed or even low, I just feel very tired but not in a physical way……if that makes sense.

However, despite all that, I’ve been keeping pretty busy and that probably explains quite a lot too.  I don’t feel tired when I’m working and I’ve really been enjoying the things that have been coming my way.  Today, I suddenly felt I must make a note of what I’ve been up to recently so that this blog at least lives up to the title!

I’ve become quite an academic.  Well, in the loosest sense of the word, as I’ve spent some time on courses and workshops both on Modern Theatre and on Shakespeare’s tragedies and I feel very knowledgeable now!  So even if I’m just involved in a conversation about the weather, I like to drop in little nuggets about Ibsen or Lecoq’s influence on theatre or whether Shakespeare’s Gertrude is villain or victim….

I’ve kept up with the writers’ workshop too, which I’ve loved.  With their encouragement I wrote my first script for the group to read. I was stunned at how hard I found it.  It’s such a different discipline from writing a novel.  That came very easily to me.  Basically, I just opened my laptop and it all came flooding out. Writing a script took a lot more thought and I was surprised as the actual writing of speech has always come very easily to me.  I was so nervous about presenting it to the group but they are such an encouraging bunch and they said they loved it.  They gave me lots of feedback and I couldn’t wait to get back to work on it.  I didn’t get a chance to do that though as almost immediately, I was offered the chance to develop a script in collaboration with some others.  That project was not as hard as I expected, as I was given the action for each scene and I just had to write the dialogue.  It wasn’t difficult but I had to get it done to a deadline and so effectively lost 24 hours of my life as I did it non-stop from 3.30 one afternoon to 4.30 the next, hardly sleeping or eating in the process.  I loved it !

I have a friend who had already told me to write scripts like that by laying out the action before the words and he is so right.  Actually, I’m reading a draft of his third book at the moment.  He’s such a great writer and it is a real honour and a privilege that he rates my thoughts on his work.  I need to get back to it as I had to put it to one side with everything that has been happening and haven’t had a chance to look at it again, until now.  Look up his first two novels “Sex Lessons” and “Three Way” by Daniel Grant – they’re great holiday reading.  In fact, go visit him at http://www.danielgrantonline.com.  He’s been very encouraging in getting me to write my first novel but to my shame, that is still in a drawer and I have hardly looked at it this year.

I’ve done more medical and corporate role play and a few more freelancing stints at the Beeb which is all good for the bank account.  I never imagined freelancing would work for me as I thought I needed the security of a regular salary but I’m getting used to this way of life and I like the flexibility of being able to get to castings as they came up, which is usually with very little notice.

Castings and auditions are such a strange business.  Often, when I think they have been rubbish and I haven’t been able to engage with the panel and clearly haven’t got it, the call comes through that it was successful and the job is mine.  But then I go to castings where the role seems perfect and practically written for me and they’re all so friendly and encouraging and even tell me to keep various days free for shooting and I leave thinking that it’s in the bag…..and then I never hear from them again!  Maybe one day I’ll get used to the whole business.  Unlikely though !

I’ve done a couple of plays – one which involved various states of undress which at my age and size is not the best sight!  There is no doubt though, that I am happiest when I’m on stage and I still can’t explain why.  I don’t enjoy camera work as much but I’ve been lucky enough to get a couple of corporate filming jobs too.

Wardrobe fittings have stopped being such a nightmare as I have just about got over the embarrassment of giving out my real measurements.  I’ve realised that no one actually seems to care…..except me.  I will do something about it though, I will, I will ….after I’ve had this mid-morning piece of cake!!

Not having seen many friends recently has made me the life and soul of all these jobs.  The filming I did last week, was with a lovely group and we were very loud in our green room. It made me realise that I actually miss my friends and I need to make more of an effort and get back in touch with everyone.

In between work, I’m still sorting the house now that the building work which started in October has finally ended!  As a result, I have a new utility room, shower room and bathroom.  A new boiler means I’ve also had to add in new kitchen units and change the floor and then, there has been general redecorating and new carpets throughout the house and yet, after all that stress and effort, when the whole place should be shiny and glamorous…..it just looks exactly the same as before!!

I suppose the most significant thing that has happened since my last post was an attack on my son when he was returning to his University campus, leaving him with a severely dislocated and fractured jaw which needed several hours of surgery and weeks of recuperation which is still on-going.  He has been amazing.  He goes a bit quiet at times and has had some flashbacks to it all, but generally he has been so calm and brave and coping really well with his liquid-only diet, even though he has lost so much weight.  He’s still making jokes and playing the fool and has even written a song about the whole thing.  I’ve tried to follow his example and be the same around him but when I’m alone I find I can’t stop thinking about what he has gone, and is going through, and it has hit me hard as a parent and I feel so helpless.  The police have been brilliant and told my son that counselling is available if he needs it but he says he doesn’t. When I told a friend of mine that yesterday, she asked if I had considered it.  I haven’t, because as his family we have only experienced it second-hand but actually, it made me suddenly understand just how much it has affected me.  So, although counselling is bit extreme, I do plan to write about it just so I can get it out of my system and then, hopefully, I can move on like he has done because, if I didn’t know it before, I’ve realised my son is quite a remarkable young man

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7 thoughts on “What’s Going On?!

  1. Happy to hear from you! That is so fascinating about your script! I am sure it is fantastic. I am so sorry to hear about your son! That must be so horrible for all of you. But sounds like he really is brave and strong! I am sending lots of good vibes your way!

  2. Well Cherry to say you have not been busy on the blog front you certainly have been busy elsewhere. Which is all good!… Lovely to see you around at Dreamwwalker’s earlier today.. and Happy you enjoyed and I look forward to the strawberries being the best ever with the added Straw! 🙂 Great to hear from you Cherry, and even better to read of your wonderful endeavours with wardrobe and Shakespeare Brilliant…. Have a fabulous JUNE.. and look forward to more posts from you soon…
    Blessings Sue xox 🙂

  3. PS.. I just came by again and I forgot to say how sorry I was about your Son being attacked like that… That must have been awful for him and you.. I am happy to see him on the mend.. and moving forward with it.. Sending you a Hug and hope the roles keep coming in for you to be cast… 🙂
    Take care.. and hope to hear from you soon!
    Sue xox

  4. I felt a bit weary just reading about your amazingly active life. Bravo to you, dear. How multi-faceted and talented you are. You dazzle me with your involvements. About the novel, I understand. I have three virtually completed manuscripts that must be sent off, yet haven’t been recently. Anyway, suffice it to say I have really, really,. really missed you and lovely to see you back.

  5. It’s nice to see you back in blog land. Thank you so much for the heartwarming message you gave me about motherhood. It’s great to hear and interesting to read how busy you are with theatre and writing. Your son is very brave and I hope all is well and that he heals fast. I can’t imagine the horror you must have gone through at the time you found out while being there for him to have something beyond one’s control happening. It’s a good idea to write about how you feel. All the best and my good wishes to you and your son. Hugs.

  6. Oh my dear dear boy, my heart goes out to him and you for being so brave. My sister was the victim of an attack a few summers ago and I can’t quite shake it completely even though she seems to have recovered. If you want to talk about all of this, please feel free to reach out to me

  7. There’s something magical about the stage, non? I remember in Junior High, a group of us were touring Canada; we visited this little farming town that had an acting school. They gave us a tour and standing on that little wooden stage made me giddy. Nothing fancy, mind you–except the thrill of the stories that could unfold there. Sigh.

    And I’m so sorry to hear about your son. You may have experienced it secondhand, but your a mama . . . secondhand for a mama, at times, is worse than actually being there.

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